How to Find the Right Man?
How can I possibly find the right man for my life? This is a question I've been asking myself quite often lately. As a single woman over 30, I find it really challenging to meet the right partner. I have a good job, I don’t think I look bad, I’m confident, and I enjoy being active. Yet, unfortunately, I just can’t seem to find my Mr. Right.
Since I haven't found a suitable man at work or in my leisure activities, I've also tried online dating several times. I’ve had some nice dates, but unfortunately, none of them have been my dream man—just “nice” men whom I didn’t fall for.
I generally think online dating is a good idea, but it seems that I only attract the wrong men—at least, that’s how it feels. So far, I haven’t met the right man for a serious relationship. I really want to find a partner, fall in love again, and be happy in a lasting relationship. But how do I find the right man for that? Does anyone have tips on how I can finally find the one? Why is it so hard to find the right partner?
Hello Tine,
I think your experiences are normal. Online dating is often frustrating, exhausting, and time-consuming. Here’s how you can still find the right one online (better):
Know what you want!
The first step to finally finding the right man online. Before you even create a profile anywhere, you should be clear: What do I actually want? Do I want a committed romantic relationship? Do I want an exciting fling? Between "marriage, building a house together, having kids" and "just that one thing," there are many shades. What do you want in a relationship? Adventure, friendship, fun, building a family, romance—and in what mix?
What must your Mr. Right absolutely bring to the table? Should he be educated? Down-to-earth and a skilled handyman? Should he like your favorite series? It’s worth (this sounds paradoxical) risking scaring people off. Profiles with edges and quirks give the other side more hooks for interesting messages, and they deter those you wouldn’t want to meet anyway.
The right Mr. Right? The first dates decide!
You can’t really figure out if someone is the right one online. First: Men (and women) lie in dating profiles. For example, I once read on a dating platform that men, on average, make themselves five centimeters taller in dating apps. Second: Whether the spark actually ignites only becomes clear in real life. Sometimes Mr. Right seems interesting online, but in real life, you literally can’t stand his smell.
Very important: Listen to your gut feeling. You absolutely don’t have to feel bad about not giving a chance to someone who seems creepy or sleazy.
That’s it for my tips on online dating. Whether you’ll find the right man with them—I certainly wish you the best of luck.
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